Monday, January 12, 2009

Weightloss is it choice or chance?

Playing this weight loss/maintenance game is quite a roller coaster right now. It's been harder than ever to feel successful and see the success on the scale, in the gym and just inside me. Most days what I put in my mouth is entirely by choice, I choose it and I reap the effects of my choices good or bad. I choose to go the gym, hop on the yoga mat, or strap on the running shoes and hit the pavement. I choose what I buy at the store or farmers market (which is non-existent right now) how I cook it and how much I eat.

Is it really that easy? Some days yes, it really is that easy. Then some days, less than others, it is not. I was on a great road to healing, inside and out, doing well and came across a snag in the road. I had lost 12 lbs and was feeling more physically able to move like I want to be able to move.(so darn close to goal again) Then came a dreaded doctors appointment, a prescription, and at first a 4 lb gain, then a 5 and quite truthfully who knows today... The medications are known to cause weight gain, and I debated not taking it, however I was fully convinced by a few that the doc wouldn't prescribe if it wasn't necessary.. UGH the pressure. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that I did Not scarf down over 20,000 additional calories to cause the scale to go booming in the wrong direction, it's so defeating.

So now I continue to exercise (6 days last week) and will not give up. Today I leave it to chance what will happen now. I can't stand feeling bloated, chubby and out of control but I do. A weeks worth of sensible food is planned for on paper. I continue to eat healthy whole foods, exercise and plan plan plan... this is choice. The rest I leave up to chance, as I see despite the discouragement of choosing the right things and chance taking control. It feels completely crummy but I dredge on... for today. What more can I do?

5 comments:

crispy said...

You are doing a great job. And how hard it must be to have the set back. Two steps forward and one step back...but you are still doing the right thing. Be encouraged.

fitncrafty said...

Thanks Cris.. I appreciate the support. Feels more like I fell all the way down the stairs; however, climbing back up just a bit sore from it!
It's been a rough few days!

Angie said...

Don't get discouraged ... you're still working out and you'll be able to prove it. You're taking care of yourself and that's important. Holistic health - balance in all areas.

The Cooking Lady said...

I have been blessed not ever battle with my weight. I know, you can start throwing eggs, I am OK with that. Do not get me wrong, I am not a stick figure either, I am a woman with curves, and I like my curves.

But when a doctor hands out medicine to someone who is openly battling with a weight issue, one would think they would try another avenue. I just cannot believe that there is only "1" medication to help you. I could be wrong, for I am not in the medical profession.

My thoughts are with you as you struggle to maintain!!

Anonymous said...

I have found even after 130 lbs and keeping it off for a year that it is still a roller coaster. I don't think it is chance though. I left it up to chance until the day I chose to start WW. Then I lost he weigh.
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